Sagehen Mesa Season 4 Part 11- The Heist Part 3 - Told By Cliff

 Well, Petite Alsace was a bit of a disappointment, I must admit. All these new fangled alarm systems make it nearly impossible to lift anything from the museums these days, and the things I could get from other places lack the kind of value I was hoping to gain. So it's back to Champs le Sims with Plan B - rob the dead. 

See, I don't think folks give much thought about the valuables left with the dead. There's no fancy alarm systems - at least not modern ones - to deter an enterprising fella such as myself from grabbing a few valuables. The first thing I had to do was inform that youngster Jarod that vacation time was over. It's time for him to start pulling his own weight. 

I sent Culpepper back to the museum basement because he felt there were still some rooms that he hadn't gotten to.

I told the Barclay kid to come to the Celtic ruins with me, and I set him to digging for artifacts while I explored the tomb. 

I picked up a few items, but then slipped into a hidden portal in a wall, and found myself back at the base camp. I wasn't even able to tell the Barclay kid where I went. After a few hours, I guess he started getting concerned and came looking for me. 

He came across another explorer who gave him directions to the hedge maze area, saying I was most likely there. 

The kid didn't find me, obviously, but he discovered a lot of valuables ripe for the taking.

I think he's hooked! Now we just need to train him up, and he might be an asset to the organization. The boy got hooked not a moment too soon. Apparently, unbeknownst to me, Jarod has been in contact with his folks. They had run into Holli Culpepper at the store and asked her how Jarod was doing. She looked puzzled. 

"Jarod?"

"Yes, he's staying with you and job shadowing Paul, right?"

"Uhm, Paul is in France on a business trip. He left suddenly a couple days ago."

Of course the parents called the kid and he confirmed that he was in France with Paul and with me. Of course this got their panties in a wad and a whole herd of nosy relatives and hangers-on descended on us - including Paul's cop daughter and two of my kids - to give us a what -fer.  It appears the town funds were tapped to purchase airfare and lots were drawn to see who could come lookin' fer us. Some, like the relatives came to find us, but others - like the fire captain, I suspect only came for the free trip. 

Once they realized that the kid was just fine and we convinced them that the whole thing was just a big misunderstanding - us thinking they were aware that he was with us on the trip, and them thinkin' he was home staying with the Culpepper family and shadowing around town - they started treating their trip as a vacation. My son Clancy told me off, but of course he would, bein' married to a cop n' all. 

He had the nerve to call ME an embarrassment to the family! HE'S the black sheep! 

Shondra was all upset that I brought Jarod along when I never took her on a trip anywhere when she was a kid. 

Her resentment toward my lack of presence in her life was evident when we had a little conversation later, and I showed her some pictures of little Magdalena, Tim's girl, and said I hoped to be adding pictures of her kids to my wallet very soon. 

"Well, you know, Cliff. When I was a little girl, I wanted a pony. But did you ever give me a pony? No! So you have a lot of nerve demanding grandchildren from me when I never got my pony!"

Why is everyone always harpin' on me about my past? I was gonna give her some gems for a wedding present, but maybe I ought to sell them and buy her a horse. 

As for Paul, it seems he patched things up with Dara, but truth be told, I think Dara was more interested in the man in the boxer shorts than she was with lecturing her father. 

Paul told me he found a woman who might be a good fit for the organization. Her name is Bianca Fournier, and she's a paparazzi. He met her one evening at the fire pit. 

I'm not sure she's up to snuff, however. Sure, she's got a mean streak, which is always helpful in our line of work. . . 

But when I tried recruiting her, she seemed very uninterested. 

The thought of joining such an ambitious organization was too much for her to take, I guess, because she fainted at the thought of it. 

The Barclay kid didn't know what to make of it. 

I took the Barclay kid to lunch and we discussed his potential and the various roles he could play in the organization. 

I told him he could keep what loot he managed to get from the Celtic burial grounds, and I think that cemented the deal. I advised him to save some of it for the future. He may want to get married and have a family someday, and it's helpful to have a nest egg when that time comes. 

Just before we left for home, I visited the a shop that boasted of its relics and antiquities. I had Culpepper and the Barclay kid distract the staff while I checked out the back. 

I was amazed at the wide selection and shear amount of items they had in the back. I thought I'd his the motherlode!

I prepared to swipe one, . . . 

. . . but then I spotted it: the "Made In China" sticker at the base. 

Dagnabbit! This shop is selling forgeries! Of all the nerve!

I was disappointed, but I had to hand it to them, they had quite the racket going fleecing the tourists!

Well, that's the story of our ill-fated heist adventures. I wish it had been more profitable. Now I need to decide what to give Sondra for her wedding.