Sagehen Mesa - Part 12 - Cliff's Projects

No one can say Cliff Mahon isn't a man who believes in setting goals. Here they are.

1. Complete the tunnel from the buzzberry farm to my property and build a shed around it for staging the shipments.

2. Repair my relationship with my oldest son Clancy.

3. Marry a good looking woman who will clean my house and prepare my meals.

Lets start with goal number one.

After several false starts and cave-ins, I have finally succeeded in finding a stable route for the tunnel and have completed it.

Not only did I complete the tunnel, but I also completed the shed around it for staging the shipments.

The shed is at the edge of my property near the beach where boats can pick up the contraband.

This success earned me a promotion or two. I have also inadvertently provided the fine citizens of Sagehen Mesa a new amenity thanks to one of my missteps.

I managed to tunnel my way into some hot springs, which made its way to the surface for the townspeople to enjoy. You're welcome, Sagehen Mesa.

This tunnel project has been consuming most of my time, so I didn't check the mail as closely as I probably should have. I know I told Tess to pay the maintenance fees on the mine, but apparently she neglected her responsibilities. As a result the overdue notices started coming in. Tim was in charge of bringing in the mail, but he just dropped anything that wasn't for him on a table in the corner and never told me there was anything important for me to look at. Kids these days!

As a result, I lost the mine claim, and the town decided they were going to auction off the land. Several interested parties were out to look it over, and I did my best to discourage them from putting in any bids.

"Are you here scouting out the property for your daddy, Jolene?"

"Well you tell him I said he was a poor excuse for a man to send a girl child to handle a man's job! Is he too yella to face me?"

That meddling head-shrinker woman was there too, so I gave her a piece of my mind.

Her husband stood up for her. I'm not sure what to make of him. I hear he has an issue with clothing. A man who parades around in public in his birthday suit is a man that can't be trusted if you ask me.

And that clown that Tess has been seeing was there along with Tess herself! The conniving wench was trying to rob me of my family's property!

The clown was sucking up to the head-shrinker, giving her flowers in appreciation of all she did for Tess. I gave him a good thrashing for that.

"I opened a can of whoop-ass on that clown of yours, Tess! What do you think you're doing here trying to steal my family's land from me? Isn't it bad enough you've stolen my firstborn son?"

"I'm gonna get him back! Mark my words! He's not going to be a momma's boy raised by a conniving she-devil and her clown of a boy toy!"

That man of hers looks ridiculous! How can anyone take him seriously?

Tess had the audacity to ask me if she could come by and collect her sculpting tools. Well too bad for her - I up and sold them and converted her "studio" into a home gym for me and Tim.

She was none too happy about that!

The next thing I know my son's girlfriend is flirting with that Lopez kid! At least Tess has the good sense to see there's a problem here!

Long story short, I managed to discourage all interested parties from placing a bid, so I was able to buy back my great-granddad's mine claim. That foxy chick in the red dress was also on site, but she assured me she wasn't there to buy the land. She just had an affinity for the place and found it a fine place to work on her computer, uploading the photos she takes for her job. I don't see how anyone could make a living from taking pictures, but she seems to get by.

Goal number 2: Get Clancy back from Tess' clutches.

I gave Clancy a call and asked him if he would like to go fishing out on the boat with me. The boy has always liked being on the water, so I knew he wouldn't refuse. I went over to Tess' house the next morning to pick him up.

"Hi son, you ready for some fishin'?"

The next thing I know, Tess is storming out of the house. If looks could kill, I'd be a dead man. 😆

"Now, now Tess, don't go getting your panties in a wad! I'm just here for Clancy."

"It's okay Mom, Dad's just picking me up. We're going fishing," Clancy explained. "We're gonna take the boat out!"

"I don't want you spending time with that man!" Tess protested.

"He's my DAD! I can spend time with him if I want!" Clancy retorted.

Driving a wedge between them was easier than I thought.

Once we got in the boat, Clancy seemed to have a sense of dread. Was it that he was afraid his mother would kill him when he got home?

Or was he afraid we were going to be lambasted by a sailboat? I guess we'll never know for sure.

(The boat missed us by a mile if you ask me!)

Even after the boat missed us and we got our lines in the water, Clancy still didn't look like he was having a good time.

I wondered if news of his girlfriend and that Lopez kid had gotten back to him, but I decided if he wanted to talk about it, he would. We just spent the next couple hours enjoying the scenery and fishing.

After I dropped him back at Tess' house, I went to pay my accomplice Lorie Thurston a visit. She recently married a guy name of Brock Thurston. Brock was an amateur athlete until she provided him with some buzzberry, and he quickly advanced to a team captain. Lorie wanted me to meet him and also see their horse Eclipse, who has also received steady doses of buzzberry and is now a champion in the equestrian competitions.

Brock congratulated me on completing the tunnel, and I congratulated him on his quick advancement in his career. "Yeah, I'm so glad I got to know Lorie and we got together. I can get buzzberry so much cheaper through her than I was getting it through Dr. Baum," he explained.

"Baum was dealing buzzberry?!?" I asked incredulously. "I thought he was a straight arrow."

"Oh yeah, he's not as on the up-and-up as some people might think. We used to meet out at the junkyard and make the exchange," Brock explained.

"But enough of that. I wanted you to take a look at my horse Eclipse! He's a champion now that buzzberry has been added to his diet."

"That is a good-lookin horse," I admitted. "Do you have plans of breeding him. I bet you'd make a ton on stud fees."

"Yep, that's the plan. I might even get another foal and start it out early on the buzzberry and see how that goes," Brock confided.

It was getting late, so I headed for home.

The next day, I got a letter in the mail from the woman in the red dress.

Which leads me to my 3rd goal: marry a good looking woman and have her clean my house and cook for me. Bobbi and I started seeing each other.

I guess I would call our relationship a stormy one. Sometimes she'll be sweet as can be, . . .

and the next she just turns on me. I was over at her house the other day and was on the receiving end of one of her mood swings.

She says it has something to do with a remark I made about her breath. I couldn't reason with her so I went home. Later, when I felt she had cooled off a bit. I called her up.