Sagehen Mesa - Part 3 - Jolene's Dirt
Hi. You’ve heard from some of the old folks around town already, and I’m sure they were singing the praises of this "quaint little town."
It’s time you heard from the youth of the town as we have our own point of view, and it’s just as valid as any other person’s. My name is Jolene Roland, and I’m 16 years old. I live with my parents and little sister Kathy. The small town life seems to suit the rest of the family just fine - Dad and Kathy have the dog and horse, and Mom has her greenhouse and orchard. These things keep them happy, but I know I am meant for bigger things, and I can’t wait to shake the dust of this hick town off my feet and see the rest of the world.
I want to go to college, get a journalism degree, and become an investigative journalist, digging up all the dirt that is being swept under the carpet and exposing crime, scandals, and schemes to the public because the public has a right to know what has been going on under their noses!
I like to view Sagehen Mesa as a training ground for the important stories I will cover in a few short years. Even small towns have scandals and dirty little secrets that can be uncovered. I met one of the paparazzi the other day, and I’m hoping she will become a mentor for me. Her name is Kristen Figueroa, and she seems willing to show me the ropes.
So buckle up buttercup, and come along with me! I’ll show you the seedy underbelly of this seemingly perfect little town.
I bet you’ve already heard about that sleazy Mr. Culpepper who worked at the school and was perving all over poor Miss Baum. Well I heard from Kristen that the school board held a closed-door meeting and STRONGLY suggested that Mr. Culpepper retire and spend more time at the fishing pond and leave women half his age alone! And that’s just what he did. I saw him with his brother out at the pond having a friendly competition to see who could catch the best, most, and biggest fish.
You’ve probably also heard about Mr. Mahon and what a jerk he is to his wife. It’s no secret that they have a bad marriage.
I’m here to tell you Mr. Mahon is a lot more violent than Mrs. Mahon lets on. He hasn’t laid a hand on his family - Clancy would have told me if he had - but I overheard Mom tell Dad about an incident she witnessed not long ago.
One night a few weeks back she was out at Mahon’s Mine, just reading and enjoying the scenery. Some other people were around that evening too - tourists maybe, because she didn't recognize them. One of them was a mysterious woman in a red dress. She was seen earlier downtown leading a protest for better internet connections and pricing. (The internet is pretty spotty and unreliable out here.)
Mom said the woman was very pretty. Mr. Mahon thought she was pretty too. Mom said he was trying to impress the woman and was being very flirty with her. He caught this blue lizard and tried to give it to her as a gift, telling her it was good luck and would help her recognize her prince charming.
It turns out that she was there with a date. His name was Michael Meek, and he was not too happy with Mr. Mahon coming on to his girl. Michael must be new to town or just visiting because he hauled off and slapped Mr. Mahon SEVERAL TIMES, and nobody who knows him would do that!
The lady in red and Mom just turned their backs and minded their own business! There was no way they were going to get in the middle of that battle! Sure enough, Mr. Mahon bested Michael Meek.
The woman in the red dress thought it was really funny that two grown men were fighting over her. I wonder if someday men will fight each other over me. I hope so! It’s so romantic! Not mean, married ones though. Single, handsome ones are what I want. For now, I’m content with Clancy. He’s shy and sweet and treats me nice.
I sometimes go home with Clancy and we do our homework together.
On one of those evenings, I was heading home, going past Mahon’s Mine, when I saw a hole with some light coming from it, so of course I had to investigate. What’s Mr. Mahon up to? Does he have a secret tunnel for trafficking buzzberry? Did he strike it rich, and was he down in the hole extracting gems and precious metals?
As I approached the hole, my foot slipped in the mud and I fell into the hole. I clung to the edge with all my might, but I knew not even the ice cream man could save me at that point, so I mustered all my courage and let go.
I landed on my bum after falling several feet. I was in an underground cavern with a network of tunnels. This was an investigative journalist’s dream! I took out my lipstick and marked the opening of one of the tunnels. They were all well-lit, so I didn’t need a flashlight. I kept making lipstick marks on the side of the tunnel each time the tunnel forked and I needed to make a choice. It seemed like I was down there for hours when I heard a voice humming and the sound of hammering up ahead. I turned the corner to find a little man in a torn up warden’s uniform blocking off the entrance to one of the tunnels branching off of the one I was exploring.
“Don’t use this one, little lady. There’s a vicious monster in there!” he said. I took him at his word and kept going. “Wait, here, take my hat. You might need it further down the line.”
“What in tarnation?” I took the hat and thanked him because I didn’t know what else to do. I was clearly in uncharted territory. Sure enough, about another ten minutes down the tunnel, and I came to a lava river. There was no way around it, and I wasn’t ready to go back yet.
There was another little man with a boat made of stone who said, “I’ll give you passage across the river in exchange for that awesome hat!”
“Okay . . . , sure, I guess.” And I gave him the hat. Once I was on the other side, the tunnel started rising a bit. My lipstick was running out, so I promised myself I would turn back at the next obstacle or split in the tunnel. The tunnel turned one way and another, ending in a dead end. There was a very narrow crack that I couldn’t fit through, but I swear on the other side it sounded like there was music and a party going on. Maybe there was an underground city! I would never know though because the crack in the rock was too small.
I looked down at my feet and found a shiny rock - maybe it’s gold! I decided to pick it up and take it with me as a memento of my adventure. I found my way back to the little man with the stone boat, but he wanted another piece of clothing to take me back. I gave him a smelly sock. He wasn’t that impressed, but a deal is a deal. When I got back to the hole I had fallen down, a ladder was there that hadn’t been there before. I wasn’t about to ask questions; I had blisters forming on my heel from not wearing one of my socks; I was tired, smelly, and hungry. It was time to go home.
I was probably a quarter mile from home when a police car with flashing lights pulled up behind me. Just great!
“Do you know what time it is Jolene? What are you doing out past curfew?” Officer Gandy asked.
“I’m sorry Officer; I lost my sock, and my foot is blistering, and it slowed me down from getting home in time. I’m almost there now though.”
“I’ll give you a ride the rest of the way.”
“Oh, that’s not necessary, Officer. I wouldn’t want to be a bother.”
“It’s no bother at all. It’s my job to protect and serve you know.”
Just great, I thought. Now my parents will be on my case. I was hoping to come in the back door and tell them I had been out in the barn. Why can’t cops mind their own business?!
Sure enough, I got grounded. This is so unfair!
Dad is so weird! He wouldn’t even let me go to school! Then he had the nerve to come to my room and try to be all buddy-buddy. I would have none of it!
“How do you expect me to do well in school if you won’t let me go to school? Does that make any sense to you?”
It seems like just the other day I came home after school with Hector, and Dad was so mad about my grades, he made me take a time-out while he talked with my friend! How embarrassing. I swear Dad just doesn't know how to parent properly!
I did manage to sneak out for a little bit that afternoon. I went to the junk yard to stake it out. It seemed like a good place to dig up some dirt on the town. It took cunning and patience, but my hunch paid off!
I saw our neighbor Mr. Thurston (the one with the new foal) having a clandestine meeting with Dr. Baum. An envelope exchanged hands. I should type up a report and send it in to the police, but I bet they’d be too busy hassling random teenagers for being out after dark. Far be it for me to do their work for them!
I got caught sneaking back home, so I guess I’m double grounded now. My life sucks! I can’t wait to get out of here! This town is SO LAME!
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